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"Jiujitsu Ruined My Life" Hoody

"Jiujitsu Ruined My Life" Hoody

Regular price $39.00 USD
Regular price $78.00 USD Sale price $39.00 USD
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Jiujitsu is quite literally the greatest sport that has ever been invented by mankind, EVER, of all time. Jiujitsu pretty much guarantees that you will become super muscly, really strong, incredibly intelligent, as well as kind, humble, generous, and a communist. Did I mention strong? Not only that, but jiujitsu ensures you will become wealthy beyond your wildest imagination. Constant parties, trips to tropical wonderlands, legions of stupid white belts waiting to throw their life savings at you - life is a 24 / 7 holiday when you do jiujitsu! Your body and mind will be in top top condition all the time, and you'll never wake up in the morning feeling like a plate of literal tramp shit warmed up in the microwave. That's right, with jiujitsu, every morning is the most fantastic morning of your life. It's like heroin, only more fun! Plus it's really addictive.

Boyfriends? Girlfriends? Get ready for loads of them! So many of them you could say they'll become meaningless and devoid of any emotional ties! And flying to exotic locations such as the Bratislava Sports Hall Number 9, the West Florida Budget Mall, or A Delapitated Estonian Tennis Court, paying hundreds of dollars for the chance to get injured by someone far better than you whose name you cannot pronounce! 

100% cotton heavyweight hoody with brushback fleece inner, very snug fit and true to size, order a size up if you want a relaxed fit. 

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